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Random Quotes

#40 + (−1)/11 - [ Report ]

// About a Physics question
sHARD: A satellite is in a low circular orbit about the earth (i.e, it just skims the surface of the earth)."
sHARD: I think more important here, is to worry about how your satellite no longer works

Tags: physics
#2425 + (+88)/92 - [ Report ]

Sra. Pou: Oh, I'm brownmailing you.
Student A: Blackmailing.
Sra. Pou: Brownmailing.
A: No, it's blackmailing.
Sra. Pou: Blackmailing is racist.

Tags: pou
#3820 + (−1)/19 - [ Report ]

// During History Class
Helm: You can't get out of Texas, it expands... like Montana.

Tags: helm
#403 + (+21)/23 - [ Report ]

Matt: What do you want for [assignment]?
Mr. Latimer: Effort.
Jack: I put the 'F' in effort.

Tags: latimer
#4260 + (+42)/46 - [ Report ]

Chhabra: Aaahhhh... isn't that marker better? Can't you all see now?
Gabe: OOOH I GET IT NOW!
Chhabra: See, it was the marker, was it not?
Gabe: It's like my lucky marker. Can I have it?
Chhabra: Can I have it? Can I have it? Can I have it?
Class: ?
Chhabra: Don't you guys watch Mad TV?

Tags: chhabra
#3074 + (+12)/18 - [ Report ]

A: So do you buy bullets for your machete?
#3401 + (+13)/25 - [ Report ]

Mr. Lamb: Washington had to worry about the British arriving in 6 weeks. During the Cold War we had to worry about Soviet missiles arriving in 15 minutes.
Mr. Lamb: In 6 weeks you could get Congress together... In 15 minutes they can't get out of the men's room!

Tags: government lamb
#3188 + (+33)/37 - [ Report ]

// In World Religions class
Mr. Lamb: Most people believe that a part of us continues to exist in another format, in another location.
Erica: Another format?
Igor: They're a .zip.

Tags: lamb
#344 + (+5)/9 - [ Report ]

// In APCS
'Teacher': What?! We're not playing cooperative? We're killing each other? AAAGH! You killed me!
#3869 + (+63)/63 - [ Report ]

// During the IBET bio lecture on human evolution.
Dr. Wood: Did you know that if you drop a baby...*sees entire class staring at her*
Dr. Wood: Oh, there are so many fun things you can do with newborn babies!
Class: ....

Tags: biology wood
#466 + (0)/8 - [ Report ]

Mr. Struck, 1999: "I think the Rolling Stones first got started up in the 1920s, right?"

Tags: struck
#4750 + (+40)/44 - [ Report ]

// Mr. Forbes is introducing the Van de Graaff generator to AP Physics
Forbes: This has a hundred-thousand volts running through it. It will kill you, but for me, it equates to slight sexual pleasure.

Tags: forbes physics
#1803 + (+77)/83 - [ Report ]

*Frosh rehearsing Romeo and Juliet scenes in hallway*
M: What shall I swear by then?
// Dr. Cammer walks by
E: Do not swear at all! Or, if thou must swear-
Dr. C That's right! Swearing is bad.

Tags: cammer
#645 + (−3)/9 - [ Report ]

TheDanTran: the cock in this room is wrong
#2199 + (+22)/40 - [ Report ]

// In tech class. Mr. LaFever is holding a basic stamp with a bright blue LED.
Student: Mr. LaFever, there are people coming in the room.
Mr. LaFever: I'll flash them with blue light. Look, they're melting!

Tags: lafever
#2645 + (+37)/37 - [ Report ]

Jack: Hey, what does ka stand for in this spreadsheet?
Josh: A killion years.

Tags: geosystems
#1306 + (+37)/39 - [ Report ]

"California was a land of plenty. If you were hungry, you could sit under a palm tree and an orange would fall into your hand." - History video
#4359 + (+13)/15 - [ Report ]

Dr. Kennedy: It's chemsational!

Tags: kennedy
#1450 + (+46)/50 - [ Report ]

// In Health, Ms. Stetson is yelling at people talking during class
Ms. Stetson: Will you guys shut up! God!
*class stares*
Ms. Stetson: ...Bless America

Tags: stetson
#969 + (+55)/55 - [ Report ]

Eric: wyang, sitting on that computer won't fix it...unless you have a magical ass.
Mr. Latimer: Oh he does!

Tags: eric_harmon latimer
#399 + (+16)/16 - [ Report ]

// Referring to a particular tennis outfit
Lisa Marrone: Yea, I have to stick balls up my skirt every day.

Tags: lisa_marrone
#3041 + (+22)/22 - [ Report ]

//Talking about the flirtatious "virgin" queen
Mr. Kelly: When will you people learn that flirting and having sex are not the same thing?!

Tags: kelly
#742 + (−6)/8 - [ Report ]

eugene ('05):so i used to hear all the shit about chabra, and how much she sucked
eugene: then, i met a god-honest punjabi-speaking indian college prof
eugene: i still haven't recovered from 'what's that metal thing on your pants?'
i thought they taught you all about d-rings in engineering class at the Indian Instute of Technomancy
#1194 + (+487)/521 - [ Report ]

// In AP Physics, while Raamin and Dr. Dell were arguing about something...
Dr. Dell: I bet mine is longer than yours!
// He starts to unbuckle his belt
Students: !!!!!!!
Dr. Dell: Mine is 44 inches.
// He pulls out his belt and shows everyone

Tags: dell physics
#1704 + (+4)/8 - [ Report ]

// Talking about having a Thinkquest meeting to encourage productivity
Eric: We can sort of check each other's productivity. It'll be like, 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!' 'Not looking at porn!' 'WHAT ARE YOU REALLY DOING?' [dejectedly] 'Watching porn.'

Random Quotes

#40 + (−1)/11 - [ Report ]

#2425 + (+88)/92 - [ Report ]

#3820 + (−1)/19 - [ Report ]

#403 + (+21)/23 - [ Report ]

#4260 + (+42)/46 - [ Report ]

#3074 + (+12)/18 - [ Report ]

#3401 + (+13)/25 - [ Report ]

#3188 + (+33)/37 - [ Report ]

#344 + (+5)/9 - [ Report ]

#3869 + (+63)/63 - [ Report ]

#466 + (0)/8 - [ Report ]

#4750 + (+40)/44 - [ Report ]

#1803 + (+77)/83 - [ Report ]

#645 + (−3)/9 - [ Report ]

#2199 + (+22)/40 - [ Report ]

#2645 + (+37)/37 - [ Report ]

#1306 + (+37)/39 - [ Report ]

#4359 + (+13)/15 - [ Report ]

#1450 + (+46)/50 - [ Report ]

#969 + (+55)/55 - [ Report ]

#399 + (+16)/16 - [ Report ]

#3041 + (+22)/22 - [ Report ]

#742 + (−6)/8 - [ Report ]

#1194 + (+487)/521 - [ Report ]

#1704 + (+4)/8 - [ Report ]