TJbash.org: Random Quotes

#865

Tue, 1 Nov 2005 01:22:51 +0000

Student: Mrs. S, have you HAHed today yet? Mrs. S: What?? Student: HAHed. Have you Helped A Hobo? Mrs. S: What?! Student: Helped. A. Hobo. Mrs. S: Ohhh! I thought you said humped a hobo. In any case, no, I've done neither today.

#2225

Wed, 31 Jan 2007 22:55:07 +0000

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// AP Biology Dr. Uston: Have you ever been inside a giant heart?

Tags: uston

#4835

Wed, 21 Apr 2010 13:35:28 +0000

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// Oceanography Dr. Wu *leaves the room* I'm going to the syslab. Samantha: It was nice knowing you.

Tags: oceanography samantha_payne wu

#2954

Sat, 8 Dec 2007 19:42:15 +0000

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// In Chem, everyone is talking after finishing with a worksheet Chhabra: You know, there are so many yaks in here we could climb Mount Everest!

Tags: chhabra

#1057

Wed, 7 Dec 2005 00:32:36 +0000

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// Mrs. Little Explaining ListIterators in APCS Mrs. Little: Well, a ListIterator goes from one spot to the next in the list. It's a lot like a metro bus. Well, except it's equipped with rocket launchers and can destroy the metro station as it leaves...

Tags: compsci little

#4085

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 04:36:48 +0000

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Dr. Osborne: When I was a sophomore in high school, I would go down to my room in the basement, blast rap music, and do calculus problems for hours.

Tags: math osborne

#2832

Mon, 5 Nov 2007 15:30:01 +0000

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// While discussing philosophies of Le Petit Prince *everything is said in French* Mme. LaSalle: Tell me: what are your dreams? What makes you believe in yourself? Nicole: IT IS MY DREAM TO BECOME A CAMEL! Without water, without friendship, but only the flaming sun and the endless desert stretching before me like a deep, sandy paradise. Mme. LaSalle: Uhm... heh. That's really... interesting. Anyone else?

Tags: french lasalle

#3006

Thu, 20 Dec 2007 23:39:03 +0000

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// English class, discussing the 7th circle of the Inferno Mrs. Bello: So here the people who practiced sodomy are punished with fire. Student: So would it be okay to call them flaming homosexuals?

Tags: bello

#1478

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 22:57:00 +0000

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// Mme. Brazell is trying to translate a French word into English Mme. Brazell: Oh... how do you say a baby deer in English? Kevin: Veal!

Tags: french

#3614

Sat, 18 Oct 2008 13:49:52 +0000

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// In SWE the day after the concert, talking about how we think the bands performed. The class is discussing Jazz Band. Ms. Ulrey: When people are clapping with a groove, they're generally clapping on beats 2 and 4... Ms. Ulrey: White people tend to clap on 1 and 3. We're completely backwards from the rest of the world.

Tags: ulrey

#2166

Tue, 9 Jan 2007 04:43:15 +0000

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Mel: I've never heard of Europe.

#3651

Wed, 29 Oct 2008 23:44:45 +0000

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// Discussing Logan's girlfriend Someone: Wow, this is actually like a normal high school conversation. David Ensey: Quick, somebody interject a cosine!

Tags: david_ensey logan_buckley

#1160

Fri, 23 Dec 2005 01:27:16 +0000

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Mr. Torrence: It's fun to sue oil companies! Because they have what we call in law 'deep pockets.' And they're so... does anyone have parents who work in oil companies? No? They're so... Does anyone have relatives who work in oil companies?

Tags: torrence

#3164

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 02:02:23 +0000

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Kyle: is family guy on tonight? Brian: if(temp.getCol() < col && (temp.getRight().getCol() > col || temp.getRight().getCol() == -1)) Kyle: well lets hope temp.getCol is less than all that other shit

#396

Fri, 20 May 2005 15:34:22 +0000

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Car: x86 [asm] is more fun! Mr. Strong: 'x86 is more fun'...you have a perverse sense of humor. I appreciate that. Car: *nods*

#1386

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 00:55:19 +0000

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Mr. Helm: James Buchanan was our only bachelor president. Some kid: Well, no wonder he wasn't effective.

Tags: helm history

#1930

Thu, 28 Sep 2006 23:16:39 +0000

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// In AP Physics Dr. Dell: Bug B is actually a girl. *draws on the board* Dr. Dell: There, it's now anatomically correct.

Tags: dell

#827

Mon, 17 Oct 2005 22:33:00 +0000

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Brian: Ahh... I'm running out of colors! Jamie, put more colors in the alphabet!

#2164

Mon, 8 Jan 2007 21:51:55 +0000

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Ivan: *trying to say something by leaning on the podium, which shrinks* Ian: No, Ivan, just leave it alone; you'll make it worse. Stephen: It's fine. Mr. Zack is short anyway. Mr. Zack: This is why I drink.

Tags: zack

#2192

Tue, 16 Jan 2007 18:04:36 +0000

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Tom: I'm fat. I don't have to wear pants.

#4857

Tue, 27 Apr 2010 23:50:43 +0000

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// Dr. Jones is talking about acids and bases. Nobody is really paying attention. Dr. Jones: If you want them to get laid, what should you take off? Class: *suddenly wakes up* Dr. Jones: I probably shouldn't have put it like that.

Tags: chemistry jones

#458

Sun, 29 May 2005 17:32:12 +0000

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Dr. Fornshell[physics teacher, ret.], 1999: "Unfortunately, guidance would not let me drop physics."

Tags: fornshell physics

#4446

Mon, 9 Nov 2009 15:52:44 +0000

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// "Tort" is just a fancy word for "wrong-doing" Torrence: You get burned by hot McDonald's coffee, that's a tort. Torrence: A neighbor tears down your favorite tree, that's a tort. Torrence: Somebody runs over your mother-in-law, that's a -- nevermind, bad example.

Tags: torrence

#780

Fri, 7 Oct 2005 13:20:10 +0000

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// About Dan's mentorship Mr. Latimer: Is the World Bank a branch of SunTrust?

Tags: latimer

#1956

Tue, 10 Oct 2006 13:04:26 +0000

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Brian Hamrick: If the nth binary decimal digit of pi...